Feeling like crap. Partly because I'm out of work, and looking for it, and because I don't feel like I'm being respected, either when I say something, and not really acknowledged, or when I do something.
Being stuck in a situation where I don't see a way out without cutting our throats — so to speak — is disheartening and frustrating. When the system is stacked against you to get out from under a certain paradigm is hard. Then getting blamed for it personally, that's like getting backstabbed or not trusted. That's called "blaming the victim", and I don't want to be blamed for something that's out of my control. Nor do I want to feel victimised.
Feeling a lot better now, had a talk, went to a nice big park, sat around there for a while, soaked in some love.